What if?… How to prevent long-lasting divorce regrets

Broken heart

In our vast experience many divorcees bitterly regret splitting from their partner and wish they had taken more time to think things through before making one of the most momentous and traumatic decisions of their lives.

Anger and a desire for revenge are outweighed by common misgivings of sadness and a fear for the future – and there is often a feeling that “Once the train has departed there is nothing that can be done to slow it down or bring it to a halt”.

Many clients who approach us about divorce regret “not seeing it coming” and reveal they have missed signs such as less meaningful conversation, fewer shared interests, less time spent together and more time spent at work along with reduced intimacy and ‘growing apart.’ Continue reading

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How to avoid divorce taking its toll on your health

Fitness series - Sportive woman exercising

Counting the cost of divorce is not just restricted to the financial aspects – and much research is being devoted to the adverse effect that divorce and separation can have on our health.

According to doctors and therapists, marital break-up, also described as ‘Divorce Stress Syndrome’, manifests itself both emotionally and physically – sparking symptoms including stress, insomnia, depression, eczema and muscle pain.

With a recent study highlighting that people who divorce experience a more rapid decline in their health compared to those who remain married, it is critical to make the time to adopt a holistic approach to look after yourself through a difficult and distressful period.

In the analogy that airline passengers are instructed to put on their own oxygen masks before attending to their children in an emergency, neglecting yourself may hamper your ability to care for your offspring who need you to be strong and healthy in such turbulent times.

There are seven sensible steps for looking after yourself.

Sleep. Sleep is vital to restore, repair and rejuvenate both mind and body. Without enough, we don’t fire on all cylinders, feel awful and can become ill. Get what you need to feel rested and try to set yourself up for quality sleep by winding down before bed.

Alcohol. People often turn to drink in times of crisis, but you should not become reliant, as alcohol exaggerates moods – so if you are feeling down or sad, drinking will make you feel even worse. It can also affect your ability to function normally, make good decisions and even understand what’s going on.

Nourishment. Good diet provides the right amount of nutrients for metabolic rate, energy and protection from illness and guidance is available from many practical websites.

Exercise. Just a daily half-hour walk is enormously beneficial – lowering pulse rate and blood pressure – with an inbuilt ‘feelgood factor’ that anybody of any fitness level can enjoy.

Social interaction. Loneliness increases the depression, anxiety, loss and feeling of isolation that divorce can bring. Don’t isolate yourself – make an effort to socialise and make time for best friends and family members who can give support, advice and empathy.

Alternative therapies. Look into massage, acupuncture and osteopathy, for example, to ease tension and iron out niggling aches and pains.

Go easy on yourself. A little enjoyment can lift your mood and boost your wellbeing, so pamper yourself with a treat – perhaps something you may not have made time for recently.

Remember, divorce is one of the most traumatic experiences you will go through – and it will take time to get over before you can move on. Taking care of yourself is absolutely vital to survive and embark on the next stage of your life.

If you have any comments, queries or concerns on any divorce related issue, leave a comment below, call the Jones Myers team on 0113 246 0055 or tweet us on @helpwithdivorce.

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Collaboration, consideration and co-operation – why we’re championing #CFL week


By family law specialist, Norman Taylor – a pioneer of collaborative law

This week is Collaborative Family Law Week, which raises awareness and understanding of how collaborative family law offers a viable and constructive alternative to going through the court system.

Throughout the week, an eye-catching online and social media campaign has seen daily blogs shared widely on five main themes: working together, staying out of court, keeping control, maintaining dignity and future focused.

Below are frequently asked questions from our clients about the collaborative process and its benefits: Continue reading

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As ‘Brangelina’ split continues to dominate the headlines, how to guarantee your privacy

Private Public Buttons Show Personal Or Privacy

The media frenzy continues a week after Angelina Jolie filed for divorce from Brad Pitt with every aspect of their lives – and the lives of their children – continuing to be played out in front of millions of people worldwide.

However, irrespective of whether you are Hollywood’s most “golden” couple, divorcing through the courts comes with no guarantee of privacy – as some of the hearings are open to the public and journalists can attend and report details of the proceedings.  Continue reading

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Norman takes the Yorkshire Three Peaks fundraising challenge to new heights


Congratulations to our family law specialist, Norman Taylor, who beat the 12-hour target in the gruelling Yorkshire Three Peaks Challenge – raising more than £1,500 to date for children’s charity, PhysCap.

Norman and a six-strong group, which included his wife Monique and their daughter Ella, conquered the peaks of Pen-y-ghent, Whernside and Ingleborough in the Yorkshire Dales National Park in just under 11 hours and 50 minutes. Continue reading

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Legal 500 re-enforces our expertise as ‘One of the top niche practices’


Jones Myers once again leads the way in the latest Legal 500 rankings – retaining our joint top position for Leeds, West Yorkshire and North Yorkshire family law firms for another year.

The latest guide recommends us for our specialisations ‘in financial remedies and children work, with a particular focus on proceedings involving overseas assets’ – describing our firm as ‘One of the top niche practices’ and acknowledging practice head, Richard Peaker, as ‘a leading light’. Continue reading

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Five factors that facilitate a good marriage AND a “good” divorce


A good marriage and a “‘good” divorce might sound like extreme opposites – however both can hinge on critical common factors which can pave the way for a civilised split.

Here are five areas that coincide in a good marriage and a “good” divorce.

1 Put your children first

The needs and sensitivities of children should be at the heart of a good marriage and the focus of a break up. Avoid arguing or criticising each other in front of them and reassure them that they are loved by both parents. Most importantly, if you are separating, reassure your children over and over again that it is not their fault. Continue reading

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Why ‘meal ticket divorces’ are not palatable in every case

Family MealBy Peter Jones, founder

A maintenance appeal hearing when an ex-wife was told to get a job is being seen as the signal for family courts to favour maintenance for a limited period and clamp down on ‘meal ticket divorces’.

Legal commentators have described the decision against awarding indefinite maintenance payments to Tracey Wright as a ‘game-changer’ for high value divorces – with the judge remarking that divorcees with children over the age of seven should expect to work for a living. Continue reading

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Norman gets into ‘Peak fitness’ for challenging charity fundraiser

FINAL MONTAGEOur family law specialist, Norman Taylor, is repeating his Yorkshire Three Peaks Challenge on September 10th – this time to raise funds for Yorkshire based children’s charity, PhysCap which improves the quality of life for children suffering from severe physical and mental disabilities. Continue reading

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Our family law expert gives BBC radio listeners valuable advice on key divorce issues

Blog montageLegal Aid, doomerang divorcees and why the summer holidays are a time of heightened pressure for relationships were among the issues raised when Norman Taylor appeared on BBC Radio Leeds ‘Legal Monday’ programme.

Continue reading

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